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Meme of Friggin’ Fours August 23, 2007

Posted by littlebangtheory in Uncategorized.

So there’s this thing goin’ round, and I seem to have picked it up from DCup. Rumor has it she spent a bit too much time over at Phydeaux’s place, and the sad truth is that he caught it from a monkey!

If the Rightosphere gets a hold of this, we’re in BIG TROUBLE.

The defining symptom (I looked it up) is an unbridled urge to blather on in Fours about various sordid details of your miserable existence, details which I’m sure would bore the Average Sentient Being to tears. There’s no cream for it; there’s no pill for it; there’s only this:

Jobs That Have Had Me:

1) Climbing Instructor/Mountain Guide. Imagine if you will the jaw-dropping cluelessness of a host of too-busy upscale Joisey parents sending their thrill-seeking teenage daughters off for a summer of growth and discovery with the likes of me. Grow a brain, people! You’re lucky I’m so shy.

2) Stone Worker/Wall Builder. My proudest accomplishment: a couple hundred yards of wall along a rising driveway on a steep cross-slope. Two demure feet tall in the front, a whopping six feet in the back, though of course nobody would ever know it. I started with a steel bar and a pair of insulated work gloves (winter in New England, you know) and ended with a friggin’ meat cape. Good Times!

3) Factory Worker. Injection molding the outer layer onto golf balls from 11 to 7. Met some nice Portuguese guys who invited me over for post-work breakfasts consisting of home-made wine by the water-glass and deep fried cod-fish balls, all jovially shared ’round a poker game as the sun came up. And yet, I lived.

4) Head Surveyor on Highway Bridge Construction Projects. My current gig. I try to divide my time equally between getting the job done and resisting the urge to dope-slap the Highly Paid Cretins who design those concrete-and-steel abortions. Think “Minnesota” and you’re half way there.

Places I’d Rather Be:

1) Far above tree-line in a maze of rocks and krummholz, looking down through a break in a sea of clouds at the valley below, the intense sun and crisp, cool air combining in a sensorial non sequitur, simultaneously awful and beautiful. The more difficult the position is to attain, the more impossible it is to forget.

2) In a car, windows down, tall pines flowing past, no map, no compass, no destination but forward. Points of intimate interest and panoramic vistas, all rolled into a seamless experience of the new. The only required accessory would be a friend to share the wonder.

3) At the ocean’s edge, exploring the rainbow of life in an endless series of tidal pools, funny little creatures doing funny little creature things as the waves crash into foam over my shoulder, occasionally surprising me with a bracing reminder of their salty power. Manchester-by-the-sea comes to mind.

4) Making love in the hot sun on a well-padded rock by a waterfall, her warmth surrounding me as the white noise of the water blends with the sound of birds, and I disappear into her eyes.

‘Scuse me for a minute…

Countries I’ve Been To:

1) Canada – A pansy-ass sissypants country with hardly any military, ridiculous notions like Health Care For All, a European sensibility without the expense of air fare, and some of the nicest people you’ll ever meet. They’d be great neighbors if they’d just sack up and bomb something.

2) Portugal – Craggy mountians in the North, topless beaches in the South, excellent fresh seafood and viño tinto with every meal. A fella could get spoiled by the likes of it.

3) Guatemala – A dichotomous mix of obscene wealth and dirt-floored squalor, by turns exotic and pedestrian. Shop in the mountain bazaars; don’t eat the salad. Lomotil a must.

4) The Divided States of Amerika. Hard to beat if you’re a One-Per-Center. The rest of you can eat shit and die.

Foods I Like:

1) Garlic. Vitamin G, Vegetable Of The Gods, the end-All of Eats. No vampire on this boy!

2) Southern Italian Seafood. A melange of shellfish, calamari and tender white fillets in a spicy tomato broth over homemade pasta. A crisp minerally white between bites; leave the bottle on the table, thanks.

3) Curries. All types. Aromatic Indian ones, Thai coconut with fresh basil ones, my chilled curried butternut squash soup with chopped cilantro and a dollop of sour cream. Pass the crusty bread.

4) A good Texas Chili. No beans, just meat cooked into the afterlife in a riot of fresh veggies and spices, the ones that make your brow tingle and your asshole pucker. Mas cerveza, por favor!!!!

Personal Heroes:

1) Jesus Christ. Helluva guy!

2) Hugo Chávez. The Venezuelan version of Jesus Christ.

3) My Brother. Been there and back, and always been there for me when I needed a friend. Thanks, Bro.


Books I Has Read:

1) The Illustrated Man. My first and favorite Bradbury. Happy Belated Birthday Ray, BTW.

2) The Violent Bear It Away by Flannery O’Connor. ‘Course all her works have slipped past these eyelids, but that one seems to be often overlooked, so I’m touting its virtues. But get The Complete Works, you won’t be bored.

3) Hegemony or Survival, by Noam The Gnome Chomsky. Friggin’ trouble maker!

4) A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking. Second attempt. Hey, I’m curious but simple, and it’s a stretch for a brown-collar boy.

Well Gawd Damn that took a while, on accounta I type at the Speed of Dark! And since I’m averse to inflicting avoidable burdens on unsuspecting passers-by, I’m just going to invite anyone who reads this to jump in and feel my pain share my joy in this little exercise in openness and communion.

Seriously, thanks DCup for the vote of confidence your “tag” seems to imply. I’ll get you for this! 😉


1. Phydeaux Speaks - August 23, 2007

Oh, I see… you respond to DCup almost immediately!

Aren’t my man-boobs big enough? I’ve always felt deficient there. Thanks for feeding my insecurities!!

(I want to join you in the first three “Places I’d Rather Be”, btw – I won’t touch the fourth with my ten foot pole!)

2. littlebangtheory - August 24, 2007

Thanks Mang! …I mean, Dawg! 😉 You’re officially invited to join me for The First Three!

You know, it really would be cool to meet me twin someday. Who knows? Stranger (but not by much) things have happened.

And BTW, being tagged on the 19th and responding on the 23rd is a record of sorts, I do confess. I’m not positive, but the cleavage may indeed have come into play.

Don’t parce that last bit or I’m gonna be dating myself again!

3. DCup - August 24, 2007

Boys, me and my cleavage have to break in here for a second to say thanks to C.R. for answering the meme.

I know, you still owe me!

4. beatgrl - August 24, 2007

Okay, I think I’ll have a go, why not. I can drink couple cups of coffee in while I do it and then I’ll be ready to start on my kitchen project – cabinet painting.
Jobs I’ve had:
1) Laundry room worker at a motel. It was the summer after I graduated from high school. I worked alone. The head housekeeper insisted that the radio could only be on a certain easy listening station (and no, it was not playing Astrud Gilberto) even though she never came in except to tell me I was too slow. I was making less than 4 dollars an hour. There was a small window that looked out on a McDonalds drive through, so at least there was some entertainment. I was pregnant and cried through most days. But at the end of the summer my mom told me she was proud of me for sticking with it and showing up every day. I’ve never forgotten how good that made me feel. Oh, and it was laundry at a motel. ICK.

2) Wholesale organic plant nursery. Groovy

3) Waitress. Yes, it does lead to nightmares. There are whole blogs dedicated to the topic so I don’t need to elaborate. Perfect student job, though. Big money, short hours.

4) Park Ranger. My current job. I feel lucky I hit upon my dream job early. I keep thinking I will wake up and not get paid for this, but so far so good.

Places I’d rather be
1) In the redwoods
2) At a musical party surrounded by friends, laughing eating drinking and dancing
3) Exploring backroads
4) In bed reading

Countries I’ve been to
1) Belgium – earthy wonderful people, so welcoming. And the beer. And the bicycles. And the men.
2) The Netherlands – I like bicycles
3) Canada – I’m glad I’m only a half hour away. I know ways to escape there if it becomes necessary. And the people are spookily nice
4) Belize – I managed to get robbed, offered drugs, and stung by a scorpion in a two day period. But our summerlong trek there and back in the VW van is one of my most cherished childhood memories.

Food I like

1) Curry – everything cunning runt said. (mmmmmmmaaaahhhhuuuhh)
2) Yukon Gold Potatoes – fried in olive oil with onions, or cut into “frite” shape and drizzled with olive oil and baked. or just baked, or in potato leek soup, or in a musaman curry, or…
3) enchildas de pollo con mole. with rice.
4) Anything just harvested today

Personal Heroes
1) Single parents – hardest job in the world
2) John Muir – I named my son after him
3) David Byrne – okay maybe I’m just a fan but he has good taste in music.
4) Christine Gregoire – Governor of Washington. She won by like 126 votes over a real estate developer, and it’s like experiencing what would have happened if Gore won in 2000. Maybe better. She’s quietly getting shit done, like banning toxic flame retardents and increasing the amount of money spent to make sure every citizen of Washington gets health care.

Books I have read
1) The omnivore’s dilemma – Michael Pollan
2) Calculating God – Robert J Sawyer – I’m a sucker for sci fi
3) Anna Karenina – Tolstoy
4) Radical simplicity – Jim Merkel
I am hugely into the library. The books on my shelf at home are mainly reference books – dictionaries, medical texts, atlases and field guides.

Whew! I did it!

5. Phydeaux Speaks - August 25, 2007

beatgrl, I would kill (figuratively speaking) to be a Park Ranger. I looked into it years ago, but my preference (Blue Ridge Parkway) had – and likely continues to have – a decades-long waiting list. Huh, if I’d gone ahead with the process, I’d prolly be getting close to the top of the list by now. Farg.

6. littlebangtheory - August 25, 2007

OK, gettin’ all acronimial on ya:

PD, you shoulda dunnit. You’re the quintessential Park Ranger in my mind, even if the “park” is “park my ’73 Winnebago over thar!”

DC&Cleve, It was my hard-fought pleasure. But I’m still gonna getcha.

And BG, Great list! Wish I had thought of “Single Parents,” it isn’t the “free ride” the Brownshirts make it out to be. And BTW, I have this (platonic) fantasy of breaking bread and slurping curries with the lot o’ ya who frequent my humble digs. Never rule anything out!

7. Phydeaux Speaks - August 25, 2007

btw, I read somewhere today that Hawking has A Briefer History of Time out now, that is less mired in physics. I’ve never made it through the original, either, and I’m way into Teh Science (albeit with a layman’s edumacation).

8. littlebangtheory - August 25, 2007

That would be great, P-Dawg, as I hate to admit defeat in a field I find so interesting, but I’m kinda stalled on ABHoT. Fascinating, but I haven’t the time to visualize it, which is how I learn. I’ll watch for it in Teh Oprah version 😉

9. Frau Biergut - August 27, 2007

Just a quickie from Loveland, CO. I have just spent 4 gawjus days (or is it daze?) in Rocky Mountain National Park and have spent at least half above treeline. Man you don’t know BIG until you sit below the east face of longs and get a crick in your neck.

There will be a blog entry soon, illustrated of course!

10. littlebangtheory - August 27, 2007

Mien Frau, I’m waiting with Bait Breath, or whatever. I’ve been there but explored it too little, and am looking forward to your pics!

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